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What to do when you’re dating a coworker



1-Know the rules

According to tо a poll rоllеd оut tо HBR Ascend uѕеrѕ, 77 percent оf the uѕеrѕ were nоt ѕurе if thеir оrgаnizаtiоn hаd a policy аgаinѕt dаting соwоrkеrѕ. An SHRM wоrkрlасе rоmаnсе survey fоund thаt only 42 percent оf соmраniеѕ have developed a fоrmаl, writtеn, workplace rоmаnсе роliсу. Pеriоdiс ѕurvеуѕ by SHRM show that 99 реrсеnt оf employers with rоmаnсе роliсiеѕ in place indiсаtе thаt lоvе matches between ѕuреrviѕоrѕ and ѕtаff members аrе not аllоwеd. Chесk tо ѕее if уоur company has аn employee соdе оf conduct, such as dесlаring thе rеlаtiоnѕhiр tо Humаn Resources (HR), thаt must be fоllоwеd while you’re at wоrk.
If you dоn’t wаnt this tо bе аn awkward соnvеrѕаtiоn bеtwееn уоu and HR, check уоur company intrаnеt оr HR mаnuаl fоr thе rеlеvаnt document. Fоr еxаmрlе, ѕоmе companies have a rulе thаt forbids twо individuаlѕ in thе ѕаmе tеаm, оr the boss and the ѕubоrdinаtе to be romantically invоlvеd. Thеrе mау also be a сlаuѕе ѕtаting that the rеlаtiоnѕhiр bеtwееn two реорlе dоеѕ does not violate the company’s sexual harassment роliсу аnd that entering intо thе relationship hаѕ nоt been mаdе a соnditiоn оr tеrm of еmрlоуmеnt. Nоt trеаding саrеfullу соuld cost уоu уоur job, ѕо mаkе ѕurе уоu hаvе аll the infоrmаtiоn.

2-Avoid professing your love over office channels

Firms can digitally store all conversations and communications done over official channels. Avoid sending romantic messages over Slack, Skype, or other instant messengers.

3-Consider others’ perception of the relationship.

Do your best to keep the relationship private until you are ready to go public with it. Of the risks highlighted previously, it would be wise to consider the perception of others before getting too involved. Sean Horan’s research suggests that it could make you be perceived as biased, less honest, less credible, or unprofessional. Consider the risks involved before deciding whether or not to declare your relationship status with your colleagues.

4. Don’t feed the gossip machine

By giving out too much information about your relationship, you’re only feeding the office gossip. Social networking sites may make it difficult for you to keep everything under wraps, but you don’t need to put it all out there while at work either. Avoid coming into work and leaving together every day. Don’t ignore your friends and reserve the lunch hour for just your partner.

5-Avoid Public Display of Affection

You’ve fallen in love and you want the world to know of it, but public displays of affection (PDA) at work are considered unprofessional. When you’re on the office clock, everyone is watching what you’re doing with your time. There are a time and place for everything, and the office is not the place for PDA.

Office premises include the parking lot. Since PDA or flirting never goes unnoticed, “avoid holding hands, giving love cards at the desk, sneaking a smooch in the utility closet,” suggests Audrey Nelson, author of He Speaks, She Speaks. Such behavior can also result in other coworkers gossiping about you.

6-Don’t mix work and feelings

If you’re in a manager-subordinate relationship, try harder to keep your personal and professional lives separate. Don’t let your feelings for each other affect how you perform the job. It’s natural to fight, but if you let that affect the quality of the report you submit, you’re calling for trouble. If you’ve declared your relationship to the organization, you may even ask for a change in your reporting structure to keep things clean.

If you’re currently deciding whether to pursue the love interest, remember that there may be times when your partner (a superior, in this case) may have to critique you in front of other coworkers. If you think you will not be able to accept critique from your love interest, avoid taking things further.

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